This morning I stumbled on comments under a song I have had on repeat for close to a week. S’fico Ncwane’s “Hallelujah” song has held me spellbound for days. I keep repeating this song. I hardly understand a quarter of the words but there is just something about the song.
It almost sounds like what I think heaven will sound like.
Then I looked at the comments and saw the messages. S’fico had died in 2016. I am listening to his song in 2018 and feeling this deep yearning for something more. I start to ask questions.
“What would be my legacy?”
Would it matter that I lived? S’fico was just 37. A few days ago, I remembered Jesus was just 33. This same questions came to my heart, “would it matter?”
Right now my heart is burdened because I do not understand why our lives are shortened. Who decides when our mission is done?
I read a lot of things about S’fico. He has a trail of scandals; family, health and obviously he had not had a smooth one going with love. He was just as human as I am.
This troubles me more. That such a broken vessel could still draw on inspiration so deep and pure. It almost sounds to me like he heard a fraction of heaven’s voices. How possible is this?
The only thing I can figure is that as weak as I am, I have no excuse not to live a life that counts.
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